High-Sided: An Armed & Dangerous Novel Read online

  “Tell me about it,” I grumbled. I had no clue how I was going to mention Janie to him, but I figured it’d be best to just say it. “Janie wants to go out with us for dinner.”

  “She does? Why?”

  “Do you have to ask? Surely you’ve noticed the way she is around you.”

  He blew out a heavy sigh. “I’ve noticed.”

  “So what do you think about maybe going on a date with her? She’s gorgeous, and extremely nice. Plus, she loves motorcycles. What more could a guy want?”

  “Another chance with you.”

  “That’s not going to happen, Sean.”

  “I know,” he murmured. “If you want me to go out with this girl, I will. But it’s only going to be one date.”

  I breathed a sigh of relief. “That’s all I ask.” Janie might think I had a way with men, but so did she. I had no doubt her charms would rub off on him.

  “Does that mean you’re going to start dating again too?” he asked.

  “Not planning on it. I have too much on my mind right now.”

  “Like Logan? He’s gonna creep his way back to you. I know it. Promise me you’ll stay away from him. That bastard doesn’t deserve you.”

  “You have nothing to worry about. I’ve already blown him off once today. That’s why I’m going to do the bookkeeping from home for a while; at least until his return loses its luster.”

  “That might take a while. Everyone’s pumped he’s back.”

  I had no doubt. “Did you talk to him?”

  “Nope, and he probably doesn’t want to. It’s pretty clear I’m on your side. Besides, he left with your dad. They still weren’t back by the time I left.”

  “Really? I wonder where they went.” What concerned me was the way my father didn’t look so surprised to see Logan at the funeral. It was like he knew he was going to be there.

  “Don’t know,” Sean said, drawing me back to his attention. “But I wouldn’t worry about it.”

  “I’m not,” I lied. I wanted to know what was going on between my father and Logan. Maybe I should’ve stayed and listened to what he had to say.

  After an early dinner, consisting of leftover salmon and salad, I sat down on my couch and flipped through the TV channels until I stopped at Arrow. Ever since I started watching the show I’d been hooked. Levi and I binge watched the whole first season a couple of weeks ago and were about to start the second. Tears burned my eyes as I looked over at the other end of the empty couch. It was where Levi sat and oftentimes slept when he’d come over. I didn’t know if I’d be able to continue watching the show without him.

  My phone rang and I looked down at the screen; it was my dad. I turned off the TV and answered the phone. “Hey.”

  “Hey, peanut. I know you’re upset with me, but I need you to listen before you hang up.”

  “I’m not going to hang up,” I replied with a sigh. “But I am going to go ahead and tell you I want to work from home the next couple of days. Being around Logan will only cause a distraction to everyone around.” I had no doubt everyone was curious to see how Logan and I would work together after our eight-year separation. The last thing I wanted was to be put on display for everyone’s amusement.

  “Whatever makes you comfortable, Kassidy.” His voice sounded troubled and distraught. I hated hearing him like that.

  “I’m sorry for running out the way I did today. You of all people know I don’t like being lied to.”

  “I know, honey. I’d give anything to take it all back. Keeping my secrets from you made me feel like you were protected. All I can ask for now is your forgiveness.”

  It was hard to stay mad at him. All he’d ever done in life was try to make me happy. “I forgive you, Dad. Just as long as you don’t lie to me again.”

  He released a heavy breath. “I won’t, I promise. Which is why I want to tell you about Ethan. He’s coming back to work tomorrow.”

  I gasped. “Seriously? What happened? Did the police confirm he was innocent?”

  “No, but I should’ve listened to you and Levi. Ethan would never steal from me. I let my anger cloud my judgment.”

  “Is that where you and Logan went today? Sean said he saw you two leave together.”

  “Yes, he went with me. Ethan was happy to see him.”

  I had my answer to that question. Before I could even attempt to ask another, I heard a motorcycle charge down the driveway. “Dad, I think Sean’s here. Can I call you right back?”

  My father cleared his throat. “Sure. Talk to you soon.” He hung up quickly, without saying goodbye, which was odd.

  I set my phone on the kitchen counter and went to the front door, only to stop cold. The silhouette on the other side was definitely not Sean, not unless he colored his hair blond in the last couple of hours. I backed against the wall, my breaths coming out in rapid pants as I hid from view. What the hell was Logan doing at my house?

  He knocked on the glass and I jumped. “Kassidy, I know you’re in there. Please open the door.” There was a sheer curtain over the glass panes, and if I moved across the room, he’d see me. All I could hear was the thumping of my heart. “Kassidy, please. I need to talk to you. I’m not leaving until I do. You know I won’t.”

  “Shit,” I hissed low. He was right. If anyone had the patience to sit around for hours, it was him. He’d done the same thing to me years ago when I told him I wouldn’t go on a date with him. He stayed on my porch for hours and slept on the swing. At the time, I loved his persistence. I had wanted to go on a date with him, but was curious to see how far he’d go.

  Knowing he wouldn’t leave unless I made him, I thrust the door open, embracing the anger I felt welling in my chest. I needed it to get rid of him. Logan stepped back and I held my breath, taking in the desperate look in his eyes. For a second, I could feel my resolve slip, but then I remembered the hurtful words he’d said to me in the hospital.

  “There’s nothing to say, Logan. If you want to say you’re sorry, then say the words and get the hell out of here. Other than that, I have no desire to see or talk to you.”

  He looked straight into my eyes. “Saying I’m sorry doesn’t even begin to cover it, but I am. I am so fucking sorry for what I did.”

  “Great, you said it. We’re done here. Goodbye, Logan.” I slammed the door on him and locked it.

  “Dammit, Kassie.”

  “Don’t call me that!” I shouted, slamming my hand against the door.

  He moved closer to the door and I stepped back. “I know you’re pissed at me, but I need you to hear me out. I’ll stay out here the whole night if I have to.”

  “Not if I call the police.”

  “They’re not gonna be able to do anything to me. At least, not before I get in there myself.” The doorknob wiggled and I gasped.

  “What are you doing? You can’t come in here,” I growled.

  “Yes, I can, and I will. If it’s the only way to make you listen, I don’t care what I have to do.” He fumbled with the doorknob again and I choked, stumbling back into one of my bar stools. I had no doubt he could get in my house, but I wasn’t going to be in it when he did. Grabbing my phone, I jammed it into my back pocket and raced to my bedroom, locking the door behind me. I had to get out of there fast.

  I changed into a pair of jeans and fetched my black leather jacket out of my closet. My motorcycle and helmet were in my garage, but all I had to do was climb out my window to get to them.

  “Kassie!” Logan called out.

  The front door slammed shut and I sucked in a breath; it was time. Opening my window, I carefully slipped out.

  Logan knocked on my bedroom door and tried my handle. “Kassidy, please come out. I don’t want to do this.”

  As soon as I was out the window, I raced to my garage. Slamming my helmet on my head, I jumped on my bike and turned the key. The engine roared to life as I revved it and I sped out of the garage as fast as I could. Logan had no idea I could ride, but I wished I could see the look o
n his face when he saw me. All I knew was that I had to get away from him, and fast.

  Once out of the driveway, I took a left turn, clearly realizing the lapse in judgment. It was the road I’d avoided ever since Levi died on it. “Dammit,” I cried. My eyes watered and there was no way I could wipe the tears away with my helmet on. The sound of Logan’s bike drew close behind and I panicked. What was I going to do?

  He gained ground on me, clearly not stopping unless I did. More tears fell down my cheeks, especially when I arrived at the spot where Levi had been run off the road. I pulled over and shut off my bike, ripping off my jacket so I could breathe. Logan parked beside me, but I jumped off my bike and walked away from him to the dented guardrail. I took off my helmet and stared at the rubber markings on the metal. My fingers traced the tire marks and I broke down, falling to my knees. My heart felt as if it’d been ripped out of my chest.

  Logan’s hands closed over my shoulders, but I smacked them away. “Don’t touch me.”

  His touch left my body, but I could feel his warmth as he sat beside me. “I didn’t know you could ride.”

  “Levi and Sean taught me after you left. It helped get my mind off things.” I tried not to look down in the ravine where Levi was found, but I couldn’t help it. The amount of pain he must’ve felt had to be excruciating. I slammed my hand against the guardrail and sobbed.

  “I’m gonna miss him too, Kassidy. Levi was a good friend.”

  Angrily, I wiped my tears away and scoffed. “How would you know? You left eight years ago, and never looked back.” I glanced over at his legs, only everything was too blurry to see. “Even after you started walking again, none of us ever heard a single word from you.”

  He shook his head and started to touch my face, but held back. “That’s not true. In fact, Levi and I talked all the time. So did me and your father.”

  I stared at him as if he’d lost his mind. “That’s not true. Levi would’ve told me.”

  “I told him not to. That includes your father as well.”

  I felt so lost; nothing made sense. “I don’t understand.”

  Resting on his knees, he looked at me and smiled, only it was the saddest expression I’d ever seen on his face. “I kept in touch with them to keep tabs on you. I needed to know you were okay.”

  “Why?” I growled, tears flowing down my cheeks. “You don’t love me, remember? You only said you did so you could fuck me. I still remember everything about that day, as if it happened yesterday.”

  He clasped my face in his hands and I tried to jerk away, but he held me in place. “It was a lie, Kassie. I never wanted to leave you. This is what I’ve been trying to tell you.”

  “Liar,” I cried. “Why would you hurt me like that?” Closing my eyes, my lips trembled as I sat there, helpless. I had no energy to fight him.

  “Open your eyes, Kassie,” he murmured. Reluctantly, I opened them and looked into his crystal blue gaze. “I didn’t want to hurt you, but I couldn’t let you give up college to play nurse to a cripple. I would have been a shackle, keeping you from living your life. I refused to do that to you.”

  “So you made my decision for me?” I snapped.

  Sighing, he lowered his gaze and nodded. “It was for the best. Believe it or not, you weren’t the only one in pain. But I wasn’t about to have you resent me for the rest of your life.”

  I backed out of his grasp. “I loved you, Logan. Even if you were confined to a wheelchair, I still would’ve loved you.”

  He shook his head. “You say that now, but you don’t know.”

  “That’s because you didn’t give me a chance,” I spat, getting to my feet. “I didn’t realize you thought I was that shallow.”

  He stood and held up his hands. “I knew you weren’t, Kassie. And that’s why I did what I did. I only wanted what was best for your future.”

  I crossed my arms. “Let me guess . . . did my dad agree to this plan?”

  Blowing out a heavy sigh, he answered me with a nod. That made everything worse. Two of the most important people in my life knew the pain I went through with Logan, yet never spoke a word about him to me.

  “Why tell me now?” I asked, throwing my arms in the air. “It’s been eight years.”

  “I wanted to come back after I was able to walk again. But Levi never wanted to talk about your love life; he figured it would be a breach in your friendship. I figured that meant you’d moved on.”

  Lips trembling, I glared at him. “You thought wrong. I’ve never been able to get over that day.”

  “Neither have I,” he murmured honestly. “Which is why I’m here, asking for you to forgive me. I’d give anything to take back that day. I wanted to be selfish and keep you with me, but I couldn’t. I know I hurt you and I can see it on your face, even now. You have no idea how many times I wanted to come back.”

  He had no idea how many times I prayed he would. As pathetic as that sounded, I wanted him back. “Why are you here now?”

  His gaze drifted to the ravine and his jaw clenched. “I’m here to find out who killed Levi.” He walked up to the guardrail, his expression full of guilt. “If I’d gotten here earlier, he might still be alive.”

  “How’s that?”

  He sighed. “Levi called after Ethan got fired and told me everything he said, that my accident might have been intentional. He wanted me to come and investigate. I told him I couldn’t. He was so angry with me.”

  “That’s why he was upset. I couldn’t figure it out,” I blurted, shaking my head. But something didn’t add up. “Wait. I’m sorry . . . how would you be able to investigate?”

  Logan rubbed a hand over his weary face, his serious gaze on mine. “I’m an FBI agent. I’ve been working undercover for years.”

  “Oh my God,” I said, slapping a hand over my mouth. “I didn’t think you’d be able to after the accident.”

  “I took a year off school, then doubled up each semester when I went back. If I couldn’t have racing, and I couldn’t have you, then nothing was going to stand in my way of becoming an FBI agent.”

  “You always get what you want, don’t you?”

  “Not always,” he whispered.

  We stared at each other, and for the briefest of moments, I completely lost myself in him, in the possibilities. Then I tore my gaze away. My insides feeling numb. For eight years, I’d believed one thing, then he came back and told me something completely different. What if Levi hadn’t been killed? Would Logan be standing in front of me now?

  For a split second, it felt like I could finally get closure, but the more I thought about him being back, the farther away that seemed. Anger welled up again.

  “Kassie,” he called out, trying to get my attention. Huffing, I met his eyes. “You’re not gonna forgive me, are you?”

  I lifted up my hands. “How can I? The only reason you’re back is because of Levi’s death, not me.” Tears filled my eyes and I turned away from him. “I’ve lost too many people, Logan. My mother died a month ago, and now my best friend. You say you didn’t want to leave me, but you weren’t here when I needed you the most.”

  “Kassie,” he murmured, his steps drawing closer. His phone rang and he growled in frustration. “Yeah?” he answered.

  I angrily wiped my tears away and turned around. He didn’t need to see my pain. The last thing I wanted was his pity. I could hear a deep voice on the other end, but I couldn’t make out what he said.

  “Good deal,” Logan replied. “Meet me at my place later and we’ll get to work.” He hung up and slipped his phone back into his pocket.

  “Everything okay?” I asked blandly.

  He nodded. “I have to get back soon. But I don’t want to go until we talk this out.”

  I shrugged as if I didn’t care, even though I was breaking on the inside. “There’s nothing to talk about. You’re here for a mission and once it’s over, you’ll be gone. It’s all business as usual.”

  “That’s not all I’m here for, K
assie,” he said, taking a step toward me.

  I lifted a hand, halting him. “It’s probably best it is. So let’s get back to your task. What all are you going to do to help my father?”

  His jaw clenched. “Are you gonna be difficult this whole time?”

  Standing straighter, I crossed my arms over my chest. “Maybe. Then again, you deserve it. Now,” I said, waving my hand impatiently, “tell me about your plans.”

  “First, your father’s going to let me put up security cameras around the shop. If anyone tries to do anything malicious, I’ll know.”

  “Do you have any leads?”

  “Not yet, but I have ruled some past acquaintances out. Whoever wants revenge on your dad, targeted Levi and Ethan for a reason. I just need to figure out why. I’m hoping by bringing Ethan back, it’ll piss those people off.”

  “Isn’t that dangerous? I don’t want Ethan to get hurt.”

  “Ethan knows the dangers and offered to come back willingly. I’ll figure this out before anyone gets hurt, especially you. Whoever these people are, they aren’t afraid to kill. I need you to be on your guard at all times.”

  “I see you’re still the overprotective ass you were before.” The sound of his chuckle made my chest ache. I used to love hearing it, long ago.

  “Always. Now get on your bike so I can follow you home. I want to make sure you get there safely. Then tonight, once I get done at your dad’s shop, I want to see you again.”

  “Where are you staying?”

  He nodded toward the road. “The same place I lived before.” Which happened to be right down the street from me; effectively making him my neighbor, since there was no one else to the right of my cabin.

  I didn’t know if I was ready to step foot in his place yet. There were so many memories there. “I think you’ve said everything you needed to. What more could you possibly have to tell me?”

  Gaze torn, he straddled his bike and sighed. “You have no idea. Now hop on your bike and let’s go.”

  “What if I want to stay here?” I countered.